Monday, March 4, 2013

Today.

I wrote this last Tuesday when I was at my wits end about everything going on right now. I figured I could still post it even if it is--oh, almost the next Tuesday!

Today (Tuesday) I stayed home from school because I have basically worried myself into a frenzy. I made myself sick. At least, I think I made myself sick, although I could have a very well timed stomach virus that coincided accidentally with everything going on in our lives.

Today (Tuesday) I am frustrated. I am on my knees waiting for God's every last move. There have been a lot of ups and downs in this house process. I'm just ready for it to be over! This time next week, we'll be preparing to close on our house and move. We got to a point where I was getting comfortable thinking all things are a done deal. My husband said today, "Maybe God is just trying to show us that he's still God. Down to the last minute. Down to the final penny. Down to the very moment of closing. God is a God of details.  He still wants us on our knees praying every second even when we feel this is sovereignly ordained by Him."

What words of wisdom! I love my hubby so much!

Today I am tired. I am tired because we have so much on our plates right now. There are days that being a working mom is just exhausting. It's so hard to balance work, home, quiet times, husband, and schedules. It's just hard. Some days I love it; other days I hate it. Today is a mixed day.

Today I look forward with anticipation to the future. I have no idea what it will look like. There is so much ahead of us (potentially) that could go wrong or could go right. We just have to trust God.

Today (Friday), we have some details on the house that have completely worked themselves out only to be given another list of things to "prove" or "show" or "provide" to the bank. I'm telling you! It's a process buying a house! I'm excited to go look at the house again this afternoon as we do a walk through of work that has been completed.

Today (the real today--as in, Monday), I'm overwhelmed by the amount of packing that needs to be done. I'm not really sure how it will all get accomplished, but somehow. It will.

Today I realized there is a fine line between being someone's child's teacher and them being your loan agent. Let's just say one of my parents (of my children in my class) is getting our loan for us. He's been great, but through this process...he's started to see how easily I stress out. I'm not sure I ever want anyone else (other than C & family) to see that side of me. I told him today, "Now you see how I can keep 21 kids on track." He laughed. He probably now thinks I'm officially crazy. He's very nice, though. He even went to one of our banks for us to finish off some documents that I'm having trouble trying to pick up since I work at a late school. Maybe it does pay to teach someone's kid?

In three days, I'll have the keys to our house. A whole lot of moving later, and a week off from work will finally feel like freedom to me. We started this process so long ago. I'm just ready to be done. =)

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