Monday, May 14, 2012

I've tried so many times to write a post and other ramblings.

I started a post last week that I entitled "Teachers hate the month of May." But I'd like to keep my job teaching oh so precious little ones at my oh so precious school, so I nixed that idea. Then I was reminded of other things and other people who have other oh so real problems, so I nixed the idea all together.

Life isn't about me.

I found this verse when I was googling "Christ as the center" to see what would come up as an attitude adjustment. You see? My thorn in my side? I have that Grass Is Greener Syndrome. If you also have GIGS, you realize how the grass is not always greener, how you turn everything into being about you when it so is not, and the last symptom of self pity at the least little thing.

I am proud to say that I have GIGS, I founded GIGS Anonymous, and I'm the President of GIGS. Of my sinful struggles? My thorn in my side? Yup, it'd be GIGS.

Imagine my surprise to find this verse when I googled:

where they crucified Him, and two others with Him, one on either side, and Jesus in the center.
 ----John 19:18

This is just a little too much for my detail oriented planner self to even comprehend when I read this verse. It's not a deep theological verse. I'm not sure that any pastor has every done an in depth text study dissecting the profound meaning behind John 19:18. Sure, I've heard many a sermon preached about the crucifixion and the cross. It just wasn't until now--albeit after a Google search--that I saw exactly what Christ wanted me to see today.

Here's where I get to make my ramble make some sense.

Our God is a very, very detailed oriented God.

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb.
---Psalm 139:13

But the very hairs of your head are all numbered.
---Matthew 10:30

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.
---Jeremiah 29:11

Now back to John 19:18. WHERE exactly was Christ crucified?

I'll give you a minute to go back and read it again.

You done?

Did you see it?

Go look again.

::Twiddles thumbs::

YES! Even in his death, Christ was still crucified in the center of the two thieves. He was always in the center of everything when amongst humans in our world. He was in the center of the sinners in his life. He was in the center of the sinners in his death. God always had his son in the center of everything.

So I asked myself, "Leah," (since I like to randomly talk to myself apparently), "Leah, is Jesus in the center of your little world right now?"

Jesus should be the center of my life, and last week? Last week when I wrote the blog entitled "Teachers hate the month of May" I can assure you that Jesus was most assuredly not in the center of my life.

Pretty sure my weekend didn't focus on Jesus. Oh, I went to church, but Jesus was not the center.

This morning? Yup. He was still not the center of my little world.

I am my own worse enemy, and I am my own problem sometimes! So here is to a new week of making Jesus take the center of my life again. It is time to put the train back on the track. You might not have needed to hear that, but I needed to write it for myself.

Have a great week!

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